The In-Between Time

I hate waiting. That's all I seem to be doing these days; waiting for school to start, waiting for my resumes to bring job interviews, waiting for interviews to bring a job, waiting for paperwork to come through so I can finish student loan applications. Waiting.
It's times like these I realize how much I am often ruled by my emotions. While there is a good chance things will work out it the end, the niggling uncertainty hiding in all these situations is adding up to one big seething ball of doubt. What if? What if? What if? Some burdens can be dispelled with some deep breathing, a cup of tea and a Rumi poem, but I may just have to slug my way through this bundle of shadows. But what, how, when, why - I am headless.
I made a list. Jotted a little checklist of things I could do. This blog was one of them. As far as things I could do to ensure my future security go, it's fairly minor. But it's something. A little ferret pulled from the churning pile of vermin hiding somewhere between my hope and my cockles. Later, I can mow the lawn.
So this is it. A slight easing, some minor progress, a bit of forward momentum. One minute at at time. Lord. One minute at a time.